Jealousy and the Evil Eye

So I’ve decided to keep things from my friends, not because I have anything to hide, but because of their evil eye. We were in a club a few weeks back when I met BarWoman. As I mentioned in a previous post, we got together, we hung out and had fun spending time together. At the time none of my friends knew this. Until a week later when we met up for lunch, I told PartyAnimal and our mutual friend HairStylist asked what had become of us. I hesitated in telling them for some reason but then said that ‘yes, we’re causally dating’ to which they ‘aaaah’ed’ and ‘oooooh’ed’ and then continued eating their salads.
What’s wrong with this scenario? I’ll tell you.

That day, as in everyday I sat down with them for hours that day talking about their relationships. HairStylist’s relationship revolved around hair gel and shampoo (Vidal Sassoon?). And somehow we discussed it. And why not, he’s a good friend of mine and I’ll offer this support. But when you are about to break up over the lack of use of conditioner… that’s when I need to start drinking, PartyAnimal on the other hand, did not stop talking about girls, and that she’s cute, and look at her, and what he would do with that and how hot she was and how cool and… blah blah blah. And when it was my turn al they did was raise their eyebrows. For once I had a better functioning ‘relationship’ (and I use this term in the loosest of ways) whereas all they had was a hair gel obsession and punani-fantasies. And what did I get from them, no response, no tears of joy or questions about marriage. I got nothing. Nada. No response. Not a slither of interest. Instead they asked me to pass them the salt!

Why? Because of jealousy. Which is why they gave me the evil eye. I’m sure they did, because the night before BarWoman and I had gone out and literally after the conversation with my friends, she was hard to get hold of. When I eventually did track her down she gave me some lame excuse about being busy and going on holiday (which she did in the end) but I know that my friends jinxed the relationship. I don’t like the brag or make out that I am something I am not but I know that my friends get jealous of me and want me to trip up. It’s not because they don’t like me, it’s because they don’t like me to progress. As the say in Greek they have the evil eye.

It turns out BarWoman wanted to meet up after she got back from holiday. But by then, almost a month had past since we last got together and for me the ship had sailed and the courtship had ended. Although I like her I felt that she didn’t put any energy into developing what could have been a relationship and fell out of lust with her. With me, once it’s over it’s over and there’s no going back. I like her and truly wish her the best of luck. Unlike my friends.