Gossip from Da Brat!

Every Sunday I enjoy going to Starbucks and drinking a cool coffee. I like it there because, early in the morning, no one knows me, no one sees me, I’m dressed like a peasant and I read book in peace and quiet. Except this Sunday, where I went late. And this time, a boy I know who we’ll call Da Brat was there with a friend. At first I pretended not to see them, not because I didn’t want to say hello (actually I didn’t) but because I was worried they’d ask me to join them, and I wanted to enjoy my book. However after a while, I couldn’t help but overhear their conversation.

- Da Brat: Who sings that song? The ‘I can’t get no satisfaction’ one?
- Friend: I don’t know. But I can’t get any satisfaction anyway.
- Da Brat: True. Last night I came home, opened the fridge and ate a whole _____ but I wish I was eating a _____ instead.
- Friend: Well why don’t you ask your girlfriend. I’m sure she won’t mind _____ in the kitchen.
- Da Brat: She doesn’t cook or _____ clean. Instead she _____ in the bathroom all day long with a _____ and the soap.
- Friend: Really? I thought she _____ with non-bio cleaning products.
- Da Brat: Haha! You’re funny. No she got it online. Look over there, it’s this guy I know called BabyBusinessMan. He is such a _____. Once I heard he _____ in the bathroom of a club and then had three tequila shots. But afterwards he _____ all over the bar and took his _____ off.
- Friend: Which one is he?
- Da Brat: The tall guy. With a book.

At this point I went over to him, to stop him talking about me and to say hello as I wanted to leave.
- Da Brat: Oh, hey, hello BabyBusinessMan. How are you?
- Me: Fine.
- Da Brat: What have you been up to?
- Me: Well I went out last night, to a club called _____ and I met Jessica there, you know the girl who goes to _____ with Maddox and Antonio. They live in the masion on a hill. Their father had an affair with that lady who had _____ in LA and her plastic surgeon said she looked like a _____.
- Da Brat: Yes. I remember she went out with Panico after his dog _____ all over Maddox’s _____ while she was _____ in rehab for _____.
- Me: That’s right. Well I _____ with this girl called Sophie who says she can _____ with her tongue on _____ and can spread her _____ over her _____. So it was a good night!