Apartment905Girl

I don’t know why I bother. I really don’t know why I even bother anymore.

So I went on what feels like my 3000th date the other day. She was a banker, or actually worked in a bank, a little older than me but not too old; she was a Leo born on the cusp of Virgo. Similar to me. I am a Leo but my moon was in Virgo. Fiery but organised.

Five minutes after I was meant to be at her apartment, off the city centre, she called me.
‘Where are you?’ she boomed. Was I going on a date with her mum?
‘Almost there’ I replied. 25 minutes later, I turn up on her block.
‘Ooooh, I could see you’ she cooed from the phone as I got out of the car. Oh great… it felt like I was on Big Brother, where she sees me and I can’t see her from her high-rise building. I wondered when I would get evicted.
From the car, she gave me extra directions to get to her apartment. ‘Walk straight, go left, then right, up the stairs then down two flights, get the lift and it’s on the ninth floor.’ That was her selling point… the ninth floor.
And damn did it sell! The whole apartment was geared towards the view, she had the best view in the whole of Nicosia, almost a 360 degree view. I could see the centre, all the high-rise, baby-skyscrapers, the avenues and lights. It was amazing… she, on the other hand…

When I go on a date, or anywhere for that reason, I make an effort to look good. It shows respect for yourself and respect to the person, it shows that you want to look smart for them. And a little grooming never hurt anyone did it? Well, maybe the woman the left the curlers in too long.
So Apartment905Girl, as I shall call her, greets me in what I assume is jogging gear. Not hot!
As I said, the view got 11/10. She got 4/10 only because I was spending time with her, otherwise she would get 2. Her apartment got -12. Why? It was kitch-goes-classical. There was a strange-shaped rug make from what looked like cow’s skin. There were pots all over the place where smoke came out of, there was a piano where some kind of purple, funky lamp was hung over it. There was a chandelier in the toilet… and when I asked if her sofa was from Ikea as I saw it somewhere before she went on and on that ‘it was a Barcelona chair’ and was ‘very expensive’ (yeah until she sat on it). I said ‘of course it is expensive; you brought it all over from Barcelona.’ She hated me. He he.

So we sipped white wine (out of purple and pink wine-glasses) on the balcony, as I hear her whine about her ex. You sounded like a totally douche-bag. On and on she went in detail about how he hurt her and blah blah blah… As she worked in a bank I wanted an info on stocks and bonds not on how her ex kissed some random in a club in front of her. And that’s all she went on about. All night. ARGH!

You can always tell when a person is interested in you if they ask the questions. I don’t even think she knew my name. Now, although I deemed her uninteresting, I always ask questions, I am all about the questions. I have more questions than you have answers and I believe in showing an interest even if you are talking to a finger-puppet.

Anyway, the date went well depending on how you look at it. But I know I will never see her again, unless it is accidentally – and I hate it when that happens. Now she’ll probably end up transferring to my bank and end up ….. … this time professionally…

And you know what the worst thing is? It is not going on a bad/boring date, it is not listen to someone else whine about their ex, no… the worst thing is that I’m not even bothered. Am I bovr’d to go on a date again? Am I? Nah! But you know what… the view was worth it, not of her, but of the city of Nicosia. It was amazing. And I would recommend anyone going out with her, just to glimpse the view of our capital city.