Conversations on food

Only in Cyprus would you have a three hour conversation about lunch:
1 hour - before lunch: deciding where to eat and what to eat
1 hour - during lunch: talking about what you're eating while you're eating it
1 hour - after lunch: talking about how much you enjoyed eating what you ate

Luckily you eat breakfast alone and by dinner you're too tired to eat let alone talk about it.

The Best Job in the World

So there is this amazing competition called the Best Job in the World where an applicant will get to become the caretaker of an island on the Great Barrier Reef. They have had thousands of applicants and now you can vote for your favourites - once every 24 hours. As of today there are 21 days left to vote.
The people who have applied are excellent. They make the most interesting, fun person look like a slob. See the nominations here: http://www.islandreefjob.com

And check out my fave 2 (so far) below:

Kat, Greece/Canada


Mitchell, Canada


Hmmm... what is it about Canadians. My fave 2 are fron Can... maybe it's the snow... who knows...

Bite me Bitch!

DOG BITES BACK*

This month I am featuring my friend's blog DOG BITES BACK. PoLo as I shall call him, had been one of my oldest friends; now lives in the UK; and still likes me! What an achievement... for me!


His blog charts his life in south London (I'm from north London - although I tell people I'm from LA) and I have to say it's well written and funny. So check it out at:

http://dogbitesback.blogspot.com

(OUCH!)

I spoke to my friend on the phone the other day. ‘You sound tired’ I said.
‘I am; it’s Thursday’ he replied.
‘What happens on Thursday?’ I asked him, imagining that the company he works for makes them do their work standing on their heads or type with their toes rather than their fingers.‘We stay late on Thursdays’ he said.

Oh course! That explains it. He’s a government worker. No wonder he’s tried, anything past three o’clock has them falling apart – so Thursdays for them, when they finish at 5 or 6pm (normal home time for the rest of the world) is like running the Marathon backwards dressed as a chicken.

I hate to say this, but my dislike for government workers has only grown since I moved to Nicosia. Government workers have to be laziest people on the island (I’d say on the Earth, but I reserve that for ex-Eastern bloc gold diggers). They do the bare minimum, work basic hours and make about as much money as Britney on tour. If only the services they offered were just as good as Britney’s*.

But what’s more is that they seem to be tired all the time. They finish work, return home, have a nap, eat, go for coffee, go home, eat and sleep. What a wonderful (pointless?) existence. Then they’d call me up at 6pm, and invite me to go meet them for a coffee. When I say that I’m stuck in traffic on the way home, and I have to cook, clean and finish off a project they call me a party-pooper! Well if I worked 3.5 hours a day for €4.000 of course I’d be up for going out all the time. Although believe me, the don’t make for good part-people. Because we all know that the harder you work the harder you play – and government workers barely have put together eight hours of work in their life. So the conclusion is; not good party-people! Sorry guys!

And that’s what drives me insane about these people – the young ones of course. The ones with families are right to work the fewest hours they can to spend with their children, but the fewer hours they work, the fewer cash they should get. But the younger ones, without kids and an over-bearing mother-in-law, who work until three do nothing. It’s as it they stop functioning when they go home and merely exist. Then when I’m busy they call me a party-pooper. The irony is that I go out more then they do. I return home at 6, eat, do sports and then go out around 10. I’m in bed by 12.20am and ready to get up at 6.30 the next morning. Oh dear dearest government workers… you have so much to learn! Too bad you’re too tired to do so!

*To be fair – I have met some government workers and they are excellent and helpful and their job – and for these guys, I am grateful and thankful that they are dedicated their work, take it seriously and do justice for their country. They work so hard they make up for the work of the other. I think they should take a day off! And I hope they do something useful with it.

Wierd Weather

The weather in Nicosia is so weird today, it’s disorientating. In the morning it was as dark as night and it looked like the clouds would break open any minute and it would pour. Rain it did, but the floods that we envisioned did not come. In the afternoon, from Nicosia the east was shiny and bright and the west was dark. It’s so confusing when it gets like this. It makes just just want to go home and snuggle up on your couch with a book and a cup of hot coco. Now wouldn’t that be nice!

Carnival and the City

It's carnival time soon, in Limassol, and people are going to dress up. When I first met Cake we were at Halloween and I was dressed as a soldier, ad looked good too and she was dressed as a vampire with blood all over her face. In fast she looked so good that I didn’t recognise her the next time we met on the way to Uni. Our friend Laverne dressed up as a nerd and had all these stupid and useless facts like who invented the light bulb. Answer: Benjamin Franklin.

I think that what you dress up as says a lot about you. In the case of Cake as a vampire… well she obviously wanted to devour all the cakes… and more. Laverne and her nerd outfit? I’m sure Freud would agree that she wants to be seen as smart. More like a smart-ass!

My friend Party-Animal went last week to a party dressed as an elephant. Does he want to tell us that he never forgets? Now he wants to change. I told him to go as a Womanizer and wear gold shoes with white clothes. He just said ‘hmmmmmmm’ maybe he forgot what I told him.

This year I am going for the third time as a devil. I was a devil at Halloween 02, Carnival 08 and this year. But of course I always have variations. 02-devil was dressed in black. 08-devil wore a t-shirt saying Prada and 09-devil will feature a tail that took me two hours to make, an open red shirt and a bow-tie and to top it all off and look totally ridiculous, I will wear boxing boots! So it’s totally trashy. Oh yeah and I’m totally smearing my face with boot polish! Hahahahaha! Loves it! This friend of mine was like 'you always go as a devil'. And I was like 'yeah, it's the only thing that suits me!'

So this same friend who is always moaning, well I asked him what he will dress up as and he wants to go as a toilet. Is his outfit made of porcelain? Does it include the smell? I wonder what that means, you know, dressing up as a loo? Low self-worth perhaps? Maybe he smells? But it turns out he can’t be bothered. Let’s just hope he can be bothered to flush at least!

See you in Limassol!

I think these guys look hilarious! Good concept! Very LA!

Lego London

A picture speaks a thousand words, so I'll spare you the text! Read all you want with this picture. Personally I think this is great. Can we get one in Nicosia?