Cypriot KKK (Merry Xmas)

I work long hours and don't get back home until late but yesterday was an exception. It was Christmas Eve and I was at my parents' home in the afternoon. The TV was on and in the background I could hear Elita; a show I don't watch as I am not home.

The subject was Margarita; a Cypriot girl (I stress; a citizen of this nation) of African descent who was violently beaten and hospitalised for five days by racist Cypriot youths. (I would gladly describe how I feel about them but it's Christmas and...)

Not only am I ashamed about my nation now but I can't believe these people are not punished. In fact I can't believe one of the girls who attacked Margarita actually called up and said that 'Margarita was also calling us names.' What a fucking bitch. Not only does she show NO REMORSE by not apologising but she actually called up and tried to justify her position. What kind of family does she come from? She and the scum that she is part of (family and friends) not only makes me embarrassed to be Cypriot but embarrassed to be human.

I know this kind of thing happens all over the world; but we are a beautiful nation and these types of people ruin it for the rest of us. I am so ashamed. And I apologise to Margarita; I hope she has the strength to continue and the depth of character to overcome these traumas. But what's more, she is a citizen of the Republic of Cyprus and was discriminated against because of her colour... and I thought I had it 'bad' for wanting to become a Jew...

Like dogs, it looks like these racists are for life and not just for Christmas.
I hope you have a good Christmas...

Landmines in Bosnia

Dearest Friends,
it's Christmas Eve, so I thought I'd tell you about landmines in Bosnia...

I decided to write about landmines in Bosnia after I read an article about it. You see, I went to Bosnia this summer and was pleasantly surprised by the charm it possessed and how picturesque Sarajevo was. We won’t get into the details of the war here but while on a tour of Sarajevo the tour guide pointed out two mountains and said that we were not allowed to go there because they are still filled with landmines. Like anyone else, Laverne and I thought that the authorities were working on clearing those mountains up.

They are not. Bosnia has run out of money to clear the countryside from landmines and other explosives left for the war. Bosnia in fact still has 220,000 landmines literally lying around. It is the only European country that is riddled with so many landmines.

You may ask why I feel so strongly about this. Firstly, Cyprus is also filled with landmines along the buffer zone and still posses a danger to us. Secondly, landmines are not built to kill, they are built to maim. So they actually do more harm and cause more pain than a bullet. Thirdly, kids, hikers, farmers are now exposed to landmines in the countryside of Bosnia. According to the International Herald Tribune, ‘since the war ended, mines have inured 1,665 people, including 487 fatalities.’ The statitstics get worse and I’m not going to post them here but you get the gist. The above facts are terrible, people still dying from landmines? And now Bosnia has run out of money to rid the country of landmines? Let’s not mention that ethnic tensions have flared up again to make matters worse.

Where are international donations to clean the country of the landmines? So the war has ended and now everything is okay? It doesn’t seem to be. By having landmines strewn around Bosnia the war continues. Something has to be done – but the Balkan nations are too busy suing one another to do anything about it ans talk about what atrocities committed rather than helping the country (or each other develop).

I thought I’d add the link to the Halo Trust – a charity that specialises in the removal of debris of war.

http://www.halotrust.org/

As of 1997, there were 16,000 landmines in Cyprus. Right now I don’t know where the number stands.

Happy Hannukah

Okay so I know you guys are not Jews, but...
Happy Hannukah!

Today is the first of the eight days of Hannukah
Did you Nicosians spot the giant Menorah outside Likavitos police station?
I think it's great that we have a Menorah there (with the first candle already lit). But what does it say about us when it has to be outside a police station?
Nevertheless, I'm pleased it's there...

The Mall and the Drool

I met my friend Milky on Saturday at the Mall of our Nation. OMG! The amount of people... the shopping... the queues! It was like being in the underbelly of consumerism. How much do people shop? And half the people there weren't even shopping... they just went for a 'volta'. Who would want to walk around the Mall of the Nation when it is literally heaving with people? Christmas cheer? What Christmas cheer? People were pushing, swearing, sweating and shoving. Being in the Mall at Christmas would make the most devout Christian want to change religion! No wonder the Pope doesn't do his own shopping.

But you know what was worse? Orphanides Nicosia. It was like going from the Mall of Cyprus to the Drool of Cyprus. It was dreary, dangerous, almost sad to be there. Why don't they fix it a little and make it a more pleasant place to shop?

Oh well...

Fear of Phones

Why are people (especially teenagers and Cypriots women and men under the age of 50) obsessed with their mobile phones? I love my phone and I need it all the time. However I don’t ring people up all the time and my phone isn’t constantly ringing but when it does… oh lo behold… who could the caller be. My Mum (asking me to do something I should have done a long time ago) or Cake (asking me to try her cake) or PartyAnimal (asking me to party). Or a random I once dated asking for a second night out… (after 4 months? I’m nice not stupid).

What did we do before the times of mobile phones? How did we function? I truly can’t remember. I remember getting a phone in my room when I was 12 in the shape of a frog whose red eyes lit up every time it rang. That’s when I began pranking people, when I couldn’t sleep (but that’s another story). And so getting a mobile, like getting a phone in my room (it wasn’t even my own line) made me feel connected. A little too connected.

And that’s what’s scary. On Saturday night I got two phone calls after 11. I was in bed so I didn’t pick up. But I was embarrassed to be in bed and so pretended to be out at Zoo. When they asked me the next day where I was I said Zoo. ‘Me too’ they responded. Oh ho! Gotcha! ‘Great’ I said and smiled and turned away. ‘What floor?’ my friend insisted. ‘The fifth’ I said. ‘Don’t you mean the fourth?’ he pressed on. Then I used my default answer; ‘I can’t remember… I was drunk!’

So not only can the track you down while you’re at Zoo, but while you’re not at Zoo. And even after Zoo asking why you didn’t go! It’s a scary turn of events these mobiles are. They are mobile and they follow you around like the KGB! Which is why I hardly gave out my home phone. I text only my closest friends. My Dad, the one person who should have all my info, even called me up asking me who I was. He didn’t have my home phone or mobile phone! On the other hand, my Mum can only reach me by email. Plus, when I was telling people about my home line, I didn’t call… I text! How polite!

Remember a few months back when I lost all my numbers on my phone? I loved it. Now I have a fraction of the numbers back and if people text I ask ‘who are you?’ If I don’t like them I’ll pretend I don’t know them. I don’t want to be accessible to every random who I gave my number out to (and believe me, when I go out, I had out my number like Santa hands out gifts). The Americans were right to call it a cell (short for cellular phone). Cell seems the appropriate word as I often feel trapped with my phone. Having a phone is like being tied to a ball and chain in a Kazak prison.

I like text messages. I like getting them because I can view them in my own time. But I get tired of fiddling away at the buttons. I love email more. I told you how email is the love of my life and my longest relationship. Emails… and Margaritas of course. Emails are great – you can email me and I respond right away, unless I have work. But texts, unless you are my friend Barb who emails me random comments that say things like ‘scuzz’ and ‘c u next Tuesday’ then I worry what I will expect. And the thing is… I don’t know why mobiles are such a stressful thing. At the end of the day when people have something serious to say like ‘I don’t love you anymore’ or ‘I’m painting the house black’ they don’t call, email or phone! They just never call you again. You go home to find out that your partner has a) left you or b) turned your stylish apartment into a goth-shack! And then you find the phone bill.

Moral of the story: all this stress about the mobile is unnecessary. Mobile phones though aren’t.

My ex is back via email! What?

So my ex has emailed me after unceremoniously dumping me months ago. It's not that I mind being dumped - I mean - I dumped many a dates - but she did it while I drinking Margaritas with my friends on a Thursday night. And no one ruins my Margarita nights.

So I see this email that she sent like... in November... which I didn't check out because I had no computer. So I see this email that went something like:
BabyBusinessMan, hiiiiiii.... I miss youuuuuuuu... Love youuuuuuuuuu... :) kiss kiss xoxoxoxoxo

And I'm like - what? You said you missed your ex which is why you ended it and now you miss me? WTF? So being the good Jew that I am, I respond and am like: Hi... did you have a good birthday last week?
So I am waiting for a reply. I don't think I want to date her again - it's not worth the trouble with her. But maybe we'll meet up and see... but I don't think I am interested. If she wants to get back together, she can do all the work. Otherwise she can leave me alone like she did earlier this year...

On another note... I was shopping at the Mall of Our Nation today when I bumped into this other girl I was psuedo-dating in Limassol. She was with a new guy. And she totally ignored me and the guy she was with was cute but not that hot. I was going to be like: don't come to Nicosia and fucking ignore me when you see me in Pull and Bear. But I was at the check out counter and couldn't be bothered to leave it.

Also I went to a dinner party the other day with a bunch of posh people. Fuck! You can't go anywhere in Nicosia without meeting someone who knows someone you know. It's crazy. I can't sneeze without everyone bitching about it! I really have to understand the fact that I am no longer in London!

I have more news too, but I am going to watch a movie so I'll post soon!

Hope you are all okay beeatches!

Germany is right...

Was ist das? Screamed the Germans when they heard of Britain’s idea to cut VAT rates. The German finance minister, Peer Steinbrück) criticised Britain’s plans to cut the VAT rate which would mean a whole generation would pay off and added as a remark would you buy a DVD player if it was lowered by less than a pound during the recession. No. So the VAT cut does not help anyone. And now everyone has turned against Germany demanding that they contribute some of their (hard earned) cash (may I add) to the recession because they were not conservative with their spending.

Why should Germany help? It’s Germany’s money and they should keep it. Maybe I’m being insensitive because in Cyprus the recession has not been that bad compared to other countries. However, I don’t see why Angela Merkel should sign away her country’s money to other EU states because they are going bankrupt. France has been pressuring Germany to cough up with Sarkozy saying that while France works, Germany thinks. I love the French but please don’t tell me that they work when they take days off like it’s going out of style and when they have the most national holidays! What? Now France decides to work. Merkel must b doing something right saying no to Europe as she still retains something ridiculous like 95% ratings in her party polls.

America has practically been printing money to save well… everything… Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, the banks, the motor industry… and it has got them nowhere – so how will adding on more billions to the package help Europe? And why should Germany do it?

To rub the Europeans up further, not only are Germans happy to have Merkel reject the EU’s demand for more cash but they are not going to cut back on their Christmas shopping as… they don’t have to. Their economy is still robust, so why should they? Of course there are political reasons too – Germany goes to the polls in September, and no one will change tax rates before Christmas… but still… this time (as it usually is when it comes to money) Deutschland hat rechts.*

*And I hope my German grammar is right too!